Being Poor

I was reading a post about being newly poor, by SereneBabe, and boy do I know the feeling!

It inspired me to do a little research on the shame associated with being poor. I found this 2005 blog post, "Being Poor," by writer John Scalzi.

I was a single mother for years, and I learned a lot about how to juggle finances while on a secretary's salary. The biggest expense, aside from rent, was daycare. I had a roommate to cut down on my rent cost, but any crisis, like an unexpected car repair, was devastating.

One time, my car broke down twice within two weeks, and the only credit card I had at my disposal was an American Express Card. At that time, you had to pay AMEX off in full every month, but I needed my car to get to work. To make extra money, I took a job at Burger King on weekends. My sister baby sat for me on Saturday and Sunday while I schlepped frozen burgers onto the flame broiler and asked people "do you want fries with that?" I came home stinking of old ketchup, exhausted from being on my feet all day. But I did it, because I thought if I just worked hard enough, the crushing weight of my credit card debt would eventually disappear.

This lasted about a month, until I was hospitalized due to a severe infection. Eventually, I filed bankruptcy. That was years ago, and I don't use credit cards anymore. Cash only. If I have to buy something online or pay a bill using a debit card, I load money onto a pre-paid VISA card. Triple A (if you are a member, and they have saved my butt many a time when I've locked my keys in my car or gotten stuck in winter) offers a pre-paid VISA card with a one-time purchase fee of $5.00; after that, there is no fee to load money, as there is with a Greendot card. The only stricture is that you have to load $100 at a time, so if you can swing that, you will save yourself fees in the long run.

By the way, Maine is one state that allows you to make monthly car insurance payments, so if you switch to Triple A, you might save yourself having to come up with a huge car insurance payment every 6 months. Yes, there are fees involved, but you pay for 5 months and then the 6 month there is no payment. The benefit to someone living paycheck to paycheck is that you can budget your car insurance premium easier by paying it monthly. There may be cheaper car insurance out there, but Triple A has a great customer service crew, and I can stop in and pay my premium on the way to doing errands. That's how I found out about the pre-paid VISA card. Thanks, Triple A!

A lot of our fellow Mainers are feeling the pain of the recession, including my husband, who has been underemployed or unemployed since 2008.

What are the ways through the maze of being poor? Do you ever come out of it? I say yes, it's possible, but in the meantime, how about some tips on how to survive? Note: these comments are not directed at SereneBabe, but to anyone in general who has experienced a sudden devastating loss of income.

First of all, stop beating yourself up for being poor. If you are really struggling with this, call the Warm Line and talk to someone. Not only will they listen, they can point you toward resources. Also, 211, in case you didn't know about it.

Prioritize: my list goes like this: Food and Shelter. Everything else comes in a distant third to food and shelter. Got these? No? Then apply for food stamps if you haven't already. Seek out your local food bank and find out the days and hours. If you are unemployed and feel guilty about getting food from a food bank, volunteer for them. I've known people who have gotten jobs by volunteering at various places, including food shelters. The more you get out there and talk to people, the more you will realize that a lot of people are struggling, and there are very many warm and wonderful folks in Maine who are willing to help.

Shelter: if you think you will have trouble meeting your rent, talk to your landlord early. Sometimes they will work out a deal with you to pay a smaller portion of your rent one month and pay the rest over time (don't do this unless you know you can meet the obligation, of course). If you run into issues with your landlord, read up on your rights here.

I can't address issues of paying a mortgage in this blog entry, but I did help research and write a book on it. If you can't afford the book, drop me a comment and I'll see if I can get you a copy (I have a few laying around). It may be a bit outdated, as I haven't kept up with the new laws and programs out there, but it still is a good primer on what to do when you're face with not being able to pay your mortgage, including a fantastic glossary (which I didn't write, but I admire the person who did!).

Got your food and shelter lined up? Good.

What about utilities? First of all, many companies will work out payment plans. If you know you're going to get unemployment, or the check will come later in the month, call them up and work out a payment plan. If you are really in dire straits, now is the time to apply to LIHEAP (heating oil assistance) and LIAP (electric bill assistance). You may be eligible to apply to LIHEAP even if you rent and heat is included in your rent. Applications are accepted starting August 1st, so do it now.

There are other resources out there, if you just keep asking and making phone calls, you will find them (and I will post them as I find out about them, as not all of them are listed on the government websites). It is frustrating and yes, embarrassing, to ask for help, especially if you have been making a decent income and find yourself in the shocking position of hunting for change in the couch cushions to buy a gallon of gas to get you to the grocery store. There is a lot of shaming going around, especially in this year of elections. Don't ever listen to anyone who tells you that it is shameful to be poor and to want to feed yourself and your children. They are the ones who should be ashamed.

Next up, some fun things to do on a budget. Because you have to feed your soul if you are going to get through the recession in one piece.